Saturday, April 29, 2006

Caught on the Bound Reclaimed from Childhood Bear

(JAKARTA, Indonesia - Caught on the Bound Newswire) Eight hours after a pre-dawn raid rooted him out, Lonestar Bear was finally defeated and control of the site was returned to Editor-in-Chief Kevin Curran. The website, heavily scarred in the week-long battle, appeared to suffer no serious damage.

"This is a proud day for websites everywhere. To know that a bear attack can be overcome is a ray of hope in this dark world" remarked Curran in his typical over-the-top rhetoric. Staff writer and popular genius Simon Roberts was not injured in the attack, but remains in unstable condition. This has not been fully explained.

Lonestar was finally captured by Caught on the Bound forces as he fled the office, coming under heavy fire. Standing a full ten inches tall, the bear could do little to avoid the human foe. Mangling the popular cliche, Lonestar exclaimed "You may have won the day, but the night brings threats you do not know!" In retrospect, those reporting this incident really have no idea which cliche he mangled. Curran has implemented plans to prevent the coming of night, if necessary.

"He's no Winnie-the-Pooh" stated one staff writer. Others nodded their heads. "He's not the kind of bear to shoot a rainbow out of his stomach or drink Coca-Cola."

Lonestar was extradited back to the realm of imagination where he awaits trial under charges of "information technology abuse" and violation of Stuffed Animal-Owner Code 44b.