If you were a toaster...

I would greet you everyday with "Hey slots!"

OK, I just wanted to clarify that we should be getting back to our regular posting schedule (that is, fewer fluff pieces and more hard-hitting expose's like that...well, I'll get back to you on that). I also want to take this opportunity to thank Simon for boldly asserting control over this site while I was in exile. Additionally, the editor came across a work submitted by our Barcelona Bureau Chief in his email inbox, but somehow didn't post it in the no computer confusion. For this we are truly sorry. Yours till the kitchen sinks....